I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
He called his prostate his "boner button".
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
as a side note pls kill me
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Randomize
