I accidently shit my pants. So I tried to throw my underwear in their lake, but they floated. So in the middle of the night, I got into the paddle boat and had to throw a rock on top of them so they would sink. Next time, I just won't shit myself.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
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