I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
Randomize
