Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
Randomize
