the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
So apparently I’m into choking now
Randomize
