You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
I woke up to a quacking alarm clock and a rando in my bed. I told him I liked his cargo shorts. Fireball is not my soulmate anymore.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize