Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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