Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
Randomize
