so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
It's 6 am and I've spent the last few hours searching for a cork screw or suitable substitute. You had none. Incidentally, I finally opened this bottle of wine, but owe you a new meat sticky thing with those two prongs. Sobriety is not good for me. Or your utensils.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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