dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
Why did I call the Oregon Department of Transportation at 4:30 in the morning, and who did I talk to for three minutes?
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize
