she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
my poor anus
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
You ate ashes out of my bong
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
Randomize
