For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
Randomize
