She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
Randomize
