We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
