Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
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