He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
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