I swear to god Optimus Prime and Megatron are fighting in my head right now.
Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
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