I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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