Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
Randomize
