I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
Randomize
