After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
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