Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
