you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize
