He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
