Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
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