I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
You asked me to text you at 11 and remind you that he's 33. It's 11:20. He's 33.
you're too late. he has eggnog and whiskey and all seven seasons of buffy. I shan't be coming home tonight
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
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