we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
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