I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
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