Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
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