i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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