No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
