Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
fuck your aforementioned shoe
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
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