I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
Randomize
