I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
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