me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
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