i don't like sucking hair
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
Randomize
