I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
Randomize
