Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
Randomize
