i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Randomize
