I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Randomize