she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
Randomize
