Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
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