question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Randomize
