Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
Brought him brownies before taking his pants off. I'm like the Martha fucking Stewart of booty calls. Walk of shame be damned.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
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