I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
i may or may not be watching the land before time
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
At least life still wants to fuck me.
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
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