Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
Randomize
