i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
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