I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
Randomize
