I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
No subtext here. People are naked.
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
Randomize
