so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
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